Well, what a funny old day. First off, Mrs Badger had a different idea of what a treat is. I was expecting some rumpy-pumpy and she had all these ideas about flea masks, combing each others coats, applying anti-ant spray and that sort of nonsense.
What is about people mis-interpreting things? Who was it who said that Badgers and skunks are two species separated by a common tongue? Common, my arse!
Communication is at the root of all problems. Let's take my other major event today - a visit to the Badger Hospital, locally known as the Kent and Sussex, because it is right on the border of Kent and Sussex (at least it used to be anyway). They have built a human hospital above it and the Badger one is below.
So, I went there because I have a sore paw. "I've got a sore paw" I said. Before I knew it I was taken to B-Ray, given a BT Scan, put into plaster and they told me I'm not allowed to put any weight on it for 6 weeks. "6 Weeks!" I said, "How is a wily Badger supposed to do his Badger Christmas shopping with only 3 legs?" They said nothing. So, now I've got to hobble around until 2010.
So, if you see me hobbling about, you'll know it's me.
Remember, the only thing worse than a Badger is an injured Badger. So, beware my friends, and look out for Mr Badger - if you stroke me expect to lose some fingers.
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